30 Years of Free Beer- The Cosmic Psychos Interview
By Jeffery McNulty
If the Stooges, MC5 and Blue Cheer were the granddaddies of grunge, then Cosmic Psychos’ are most certainly the godfathers, or as I would put it, the tough looking but actually really nice uncles of Grunge. 1985’s “Down on the Farm” was a dirty lo-fi masterpiece that presaged Sub-Pop, K Records and Green River by a couple of years. Their legendary 1988 European tour blazed a trail for Northwest bands to follow and warmed up young European fans hungry for something new and different. Chainsaws before TAD, Big Muffs before Mudhoney even bulldozers before Killdozer… but the truth is great minds think alike. Thanks to Mark, Matt and Steve from Mudhoney Seattle got an early taste for the Psychos brand of simple and heavy. Their first two records were passed around and they soon became a major influence as well as making long time friends with Seattle luminaries.
The Aussie band’s LONG career of ups and downs is chronicled in the new documentary “Cosmic Psychos: Blokes You Can Trust” This is a welcome addition to the many new independent documentaries being made about my favorite underground artists, much like the afore mentioned TAD movie and the amazing “Kill All Redneck Pricks: A documentary film about a band called KARP”. Many of the scenes favorite musicians are interviewed including King Buzzo from Melvins, Donita Parks of L7, Eddie Vedder and a very stoned looking Jonathon Poneman. All of Mudhoney is represented, most notably with a hilarious scene of Matt Lukin in zebra striped bikini underpants dropping an Australian dollar coin from his butt crack into a pint glass!
Cosmic Psychos are three of the nicest people I’ve ever met. They are all easily ten years older than myself but they welcomed me and it was like hanging out with friends right off the bat. Ross looks every bit the farmer that he is and his loquacious sweetness sort of hides the fact that he is a record-breaking weight lifter. John’s Brisbane accent and way of talking also belays his past as a barrister turned bartender. We were later joined by their drummer Dean who is as smooth talking and smart as I imagine Harry Shearer would be in person. We all gabbed icy cold pints of Dos Equis at Moe Bar and began reminiscing…
SPA: So glad to have you back in Seattle, It’s been a long time…
Ross: We haven’t actually played here for fuck knows when? 2002?
John: I played here in 2000 but this is the first time I’ve played here with you. (Cosmic Psychos)
Ross: It’s been too long.
SPA: I know that I saw you guys back in the early 90’s I was a kid in my early 20’s big into SubPop and AmRep. That’s how I heard about you guys but I don’t know if it was at the Crocodile?
Ross: I remember the Crocodile and I’m trying to remember the name of the other place…
SPA: Maybe the Off Ramp?
Ross: Yeah yeah that’s the place.
SPA: We pretty much lived at both those clubs so it had to be one or the other or both ha ha
Ross: The Off Ramp had the tequila machine? I remember it so well.
SPA: Later they changed that to the Jager machine
Ross: Oh bloody hell that wouldn’t get any better would it?
SPA: No it did not! You have a fairly recent record ” Glorious Barsteds”? How do you pronounce it?
John: (In exaggerated Aussie accent) Glorious Barsteds!
SPA: See, sounds better when he says it!
Ross: Baarstedss! (Laughter)
SPA: I spent some time in Melbourne on the late 90’s and I’m one of those dorks that gets a bad accent just from hanging out with people so please tell me if I start doing that ha ha.
Ross: Don’t worry about that we will be pulling a fake bloody American accent! (Laughter)
SPA: A few more days you’ll be speaking American.
Ross: Everything is cool man. No worries dood!
SPA: We do say “no worries” a lot around here.
Ross: I reckon we used to hang out with (Matt) Lukin and we used to go, “No worries mate!” & I reckon it’s spawned from those days.
SPA: Yeah it just caught on! That’s when I started saying it.
Ross: Well it’s a great saying, even when you are facing death, “No worries.”
SPA: So, the recent record; did Lindsey (producer) record that record?
Ross: Yeah we went back in with Lindsey again. Now, look it, with the technology you have available today you can basically record yourself, but I think going into the studio works with us because we don’t get to play a lot and it gives us a chance to be together for three or four days and drink a lot of beer. It’s a rare opportunity for us when we play, cause John lives in Queensland and Dean lives closer to me, I see a bit more of him, but not a lot. I might see John just as often as I see Dean. So when we book the studio, we might get together before have a bit of a practice or I’ll send John some tapes…
John: The riffs.
Ross: Yeah, so we are not coming in stone cold, but working with Lindsey is good; he’s got strict hours of 12 mid day to 12 midnight.
SPA: That’s amazing don’t need to be going all night.
Ross: Ha well, I was about to say, “very strict hours.” We start drinking about 9 in the morning and don’t start until 5 in the afternoon so we keep the cunt awake until about 5-6 in the morning! (Laughter)
SPA: Ha ha you got me! You guys must have a little pull with his “strict hours” seeing how you’ve been recording with him for so long.
Ross: Seems to work every time. It’s a place you feel comfortable and Lindsey’s got the sound. It was funny he sent us a test mix for that album, I played it back and I don’t know what the fuck it sounded like but it was horrible ha ha.
John: I didn’t hear that one.
Ross: Ha it was shocking and I just rang him up and he goes, “Oh I was trying something different,” and I go, “Get that fucking thing and make it sound like all the others it’s a fucking disgrace!” (Laughter)
SPA: He’s like “Oh sorry!” ha ha
Ross: We are just joking around here but you don’t have to fuck with the Psychos sound. It is what it is. Why would you bother changing it? If you can get free beer with that sound for 30 years, if we don’t change it we might get free beer for another 30 years! That’s the theory behind it all.
John: That’s the goal!
SPA: That’s a good goal! A realistic goal.
Ross: Well, we are not going to become millionaires and for the first 30 years it’s been achievable. (Chuckles) It probable equals about a million dollars with all the beer that’s been in our guts!
SPA: Oh man free beer is all you can ask for and if you get anything more you are just thankful…
Ross: Anything else is just cream on the top.
SPA: Especially if you are on tour, if you can get gas money it’s amazing ha ha! You have a new live record that’s come out fairly recently. Is that what you’re touring on? That and the movie?
Ross: Yeah we’re really only over hear cause Matt (Weston) wanted us to push the movie a little bit I suppose. And we said, “We’ll do whatever we can to help ya out.” We did 3 gigs at a club in Melbourne, at the Tote, which I’m sure you know well?
SPA: The Tote? Right.
Ross: Yeah in Collinwood? We did 3 nights there and recorded the first night so I guess we did it for the people who helped the movie. It was a crowd-funding thing and that was for us to thank them for putting up their hard earned money into this movie. Cause basically the band, the 3 of us, didn’t have much to do with the movie at all.
SPA: He was just a fan that wanted to make a movie about his favorite band or what?
John: He wasn’t even really a fan at the start, and I don’t know if he is now.
SPA: Haha now I’m learning some stuff here!
Ross: Matt’s a well known film maker and Dean’s daughter was doing some work with him and one time, I went up to Dean’s place and I had all these old tapes from movie cameras and stuff and I said to Dean, “Have you got somewhere we can transfer all these to disk? Cause these old tapes were gonna break down. But they had a look at them and there was all this stuff, early Mudhoney stuff and early Nirvana where we were all fucking around together, dicking around and stuff, and Kim (Dean’s daughter) kept going, “All this stuff we should make a movie out of it! Do something with it just so it’s not wasted” And I went, “Yeah yeah yeah…” but then they approached Matt to do this thing and he really wasn’t that interested but he came up and had a talk to me and we got on the grog one night and had a big old drinking session. Give me two or three of these (beers) and I’ll talk a fucking leg off a chair! (Laughter) And then he got interested in it and then he sort of became obsessed with it. And it was really good! He spent a lot of time in the States interviewing people and stuff. I’m glad someone found it an interesting enough story to make a movie about.
SPA: It’s great! I’ve been excited to see these smaller documentaries that have been crowd sourced. First of all, Seattle people are into heavy rock again. I’ve already told you how long I’ve been into it but to have you guys come back now and for me to be able to meet you is super awesome.
Ross: It’s wherever the sun is shining, it might have been in the shade for a while, but it’s always there. And Seattle seems very similar, a long time a go, it was good to know there was a place that seemed like a cross between Melbourne and Sydney at the time. It’s the beautiful, stunning water line of Sydney but you have the good folk of Melbourne. That’s the correlation- there’s a big word!
John: That’s good!
Ross: Fuckin cheers for that! I don’t come up with those that often.
SPA: What is your favorite place to play in the States?
Ross: Well, I’d have to say probably here?
SPA: You’re not just saying that because we are here?
Ross: No, when we play in Seattle it means I get to see my mates. We’ve all gotten to see out mates and I think after the perfect day we’ve had just hanging out with friends, you gotta go where your mates are, I mean I love New York, as a place, and I know a lot of people there but for mates for life, I personally like playing here. And it’s not cause it’s supposed to be cool or whatever, how bout you John are there any places you like better?
John: Look as I said, I haven’t been here for a while, but as I said there was one good night at a place called Gibson’s?
SPA: Gibson’s oh yeah that’s where I came up as a musician. That was my scene. Great club!
John: Yeah and the guy served burgers at the same time as taking the money at the door! (Laughs)
SPA: I remember that guy he was a fixture at that place for sure! Another question, do you guys have day jobs?
Ross: Yeah I’m a full time farmer. I drive bulldozers, and Dean who’s not here is a screen printer, printing t shirts, work shirts, that kind of stuff and that’s absolutely full time.
John: And I’m a bartender, and a dad.
SPA: And a Dad? Excellent!
John: By day I’m a dad and at night I’m a bartender.
SPA: Sounds like me and all my friends. Except for the farmer part I guess ha ha
(Dean arrives)
Dean: Boys?
Ross: Here is the screen printer! (Introductions)
SPA: Welcome to Seattle
Dean: Glad to be here
SPA: And you picked the nicest day of the year too!
Ross: And if you ask Dean what’s his favorite place to play in the states he’d probably say Seattle now too!
Dean: We’ll see, Seattle might not like us. We’ve played here a lot. They might be throwing axes!
SPA: What’s your favorite place to play in your home country?
Dean: The Tote hotel in Collinwood would be mine. It’s a wonderful place and it’s got great history there. I actually proposed to my wife there! Back in 1989. All those years ago.
Ross: Bloody hell I didn’t know that!
Dean: I talked about haven’t I? In the beer garden at the Tote, I got down on bended knee and I asked her to marry me. I had been drinking…
Ross: Oh well that explains it. (Laughter)
Dean: So had she actually so…
SPA: That also answers another question, I was going to ask about where I should hang out when I go back to Melbourne.
John: In Queensland!
SPA: All of Queensland! Just go there and you’ll be there ha ha what bar do you tend at?
John: Prince of Wales ‘Nundah.
SPA: Nunder?
John: Nundah n-u-n-d-a-h ha ha
Dean: It’s a real working man’s pub. You know knock off from work and the guys, construction workers and stuff.
SPA: Those are always my favorite places to drink. OK so where are you headed next?
John: Portland.
SPA: I know you guys are going to end up in Memphis for the big shebang…
Dean: The Goner Fest. Which is going to be exciting. It’s all exciting
SPA: So just like down and over?
Ross: We are zig zagging down up, back and here (Gesticulating)
SPA: do you have a driver at least? Cause those drives-
Dean: Yeah
SPA: Well I don’t have to tell some one from Australia what a long drive is like ha ha
Dean: Last time we played here in Seattle, which might have been the Crocodile, we had to drive to Minneapolis, I think we had 23 hours to get there, til show time so we couldn’t stop.
Dean: At all, not even for a piss!
Ross: What was that like an 18 hour drive?
SPA: Well usually you stop in-
John: Spokane!
SPA: Sure, or at least Missoula and then you usually take a day between cause that drive… there’s nothing there.
Dean: Easy to fall asleep.
Ross: Best thing about that drive is you get to go over Dead man’s pass!
Dean: is that where most people fall asleep at the wheel? (Laughter)
Ross: we let someone else drive, we are too old and stupid, well at least I am you guys are really good drivers.
Dean: Well not on the wrong side of the road, I still haven’t gotten used to that yet.
SPA: When you first get to the states doesn’t it seem like people are going to drive right in to you?
Dean: Yeah! John normally sits in the front and the passenger seat. The running joke is “John, how are you steering this thing without a wheel?”
SPA: Ha yeah. So when you guys were coming up, what was your favorite music?
Dean: At what age?
SPA: Teenager, like when you first started getting into-
Dean: Ramones. Sex Pistols followed by the Ramones. Then a lot of Aussie bands at the time like The Angels, AC/DC
SPA: Colored Balls?
Dean: I didn’t get into them til later on cause that was pretty obscure music, you couldn’t buy those records when I was a kid, they were out of print.
SPA: I have no frame of reference for stuff at that point.
Dean: It’s only in the last 10 years that stuff like Buffalo and stuff are becoming available again. He (Ross) was into em
SPA: I really like Buffalo, alot!
Ross: Unreal!
SPA: It was fairly recently but when I first heard Buffalo I thought well, that explains Soundgarden completely. It’s like there was this band that happened that I didn’t hear about till I was in my 30’s and it’s like the missing link!
Dean: Come to think of it, similar voices.
SPA: I don’t even know if that’s how it happened, but I know that if I was Chris and I heard that I’d be like, “Whoah that’s what I want to do!”
Ross: I guess I’m a little bit older than them but before the punk thing happened for me when I was 16, ’76-’77, it was bands like Slade and stuff like that, Sweet & Slade:
Dean: I read that Slade were Kiss’ favorite band. They wanted to be Slade.
SPA: They tried, couldn’t play as good.
Dean: Yeah never got any where near it. Great band Kiss, too.
SPA: Sure!
Ross: I love me some Kiss there’s no worries about that. We went to see Kiss only 6 months ago. They were on with Motley Crue which uh, it was a great stage show, fantastic and I don’t want to be insulting but it’s a bit of shits n giggle. But when I heard the Sex Pistols it hit me at the right time, when you hate your parents, you hate the world, no one understands ya not even your mates…
Dean: Yeah that’s what rock and roll is about, it should be dangerous! Sex pistols was on the radio station on the plane over-
SPA: It was? Awesome!
Dean: It ‘s become mainstream
SPA: To me it’s classic rock it’s just like AC/DC or Led Zeppelin or Sabbath or anything. It’s just good rock and roll.
Dean: They would have hated that at the time of course, to be put in with REO Speedwagon…
Ross: actually at the time they probably would have enjoyed it because they would have made some money! And the Ramones that’s another band they are probably going to make more money over the last few years then they did in the last 30 years…
Dean: They’re all dead!
Ross: More than when they were alive,
Dean: Well Marky is hopefully… and their estates.
SPA: But they kept it real.
Dean: Yeah Johnny was a real cunt from start to finish ha ha
Ross: I had the pleasure of meeting Joey, which for me was amazing, at the Continental in New York
Dean: Now, that was amazing. What a top bloke! Well, we better get to sound check.
SPA: Thank you so much!
Dean: Thanks mate!
John: Thank you.
Ross: Cheers for that, come down and help us drink some of this beer!
